Do you think your Teen is on Drugs?
“Can you drug test my teen?” This is the action plan that parents often come up with when they suspect their teen is using drugs of abuse. There are several steps to take before your teen is drug tested. This is especially important since most drugs will leave the system in a day. Few will last longer. A good example is marijuana or weed which will last longer depending on how much the teen smokes weed. A daily smoker is going to have marijuana show up in a urine test weeks and possibly months after their last joint.
If you have a hunch, there is a reason and although not all teens are doing drugs, the chance that a teen is doing drugs increases every year after grade eight. In 2003, of the teens asked about drug use 30% were in eighth grade, almost 45% in tenth grade and over half were using in twelfth grade. So no, not every teen is using drugs, but the chances increase every year that they might have tried. We don’t know which teen is going to become completely dependent on drugs. For this reason, you need to act on any suspicion that you have about your teen.
Talk to your teen. Check in with them. This is a lot easier if you have always done these types of check-ins. They may be more suspicious if this is abnormal for you. The point is to come from a position of caring and less judgment.
Try this…
Hey, I just wanted to check in with you. You know there has been something bothering me about you lately. I can tell there is something wrong. You’re this loving and smart teen and recently you get upset very easily and you seem, well, not happy sad even. Is there anything going on?
They may tell you something is going on and it has nothing to do with drugs, but if they are actually willing to talk then please let your teen talk. Do as little talking as possible, listen and be supportive.
3 ways to be supportive…
1. I love you and I am going to do what I can to get us the help we need. Although you will not be alone, you alone have the power to overcome your drug use.
2. I’ll call your pediatrician or teen doctor and ask them about resources in the area.
3. Let’s see if we can find a local drug treatment center. (There are great online resources)
It is very important to refrain from blame even if you yourself have a history of substance abuse. You feeling guilty or like a hypocrite is not going to help and may in fact hurt the situation. Guilty parents will not be firm with their teen and set a zero toelrance drug policy in the home. Guilty parents are so consumed in how they may have caused their teens drug problems, they don’t stop to consider their teen can make their own choices to use or not use.
Drug abuse is a life or death situation. You should treat it as such and reach out for help early. NO family is prepared to handle a teen on drugs. A teen on drugs is no longer the teen you love and seeking help early can increase the chances of getting that teen back.
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