No one wanted to say the “D”* or the “C”* words back in the seventies, but today these words are the foundation of a TV series.
When you take these words that no one wants to say and speak them around your younger teen the words circle above their head and all is allowed to remain private, but as your teen’s brain gets more sophisticated you may have some questions to answer.
Divorce looks different to a child versus a middle teen. Behaviors that you brushed off are now experienced by your teen and they start to wonder why you never said anything about Dad’s selfishness or Mom’s pickiness. There is always the belief that you should try your best to limit disparaging comments about the other parent, but part of your relationship with your teen is that you both expect honesty.
Your effort to validate their experience doesn’t mean you have to say negative things about the other parent even if you both live in the same house, but your dismissal as though it were nothing can leave you without any street cred and complete impotence when it comes to being a “go to” on other important issues whether they’re about relationships or if this shirt goes with these pants.
C’mon, your teen’s getting smarter and their insight into certain personalities and behaviors in relationships is what helps them make better choices with their own relationships. If the emperor ain’t got no clothes on then just say, “He’s nekkid!”
*D = Divorce
*C = Cancer