TheTeenDoc.com » coping skills

Should Your Teen Take A Pill For Stress?

Kemi — Wed, 05 May 2010 11:00:02 +0000

Your teen is going through a very stressful time with finals, college applications and they also have a job and play soccer year round. They are barely getting any sleep and it has started to show in their disposition. After a conversation at dinner about their overall sense of well-being, your teen poses as a solution, antianxiety medication. What do you say?

Its so tempting to use a pill to get through a difficult time. Sometimes this is necessary (e.g. when someone is depressed or really can’t function), but more often than not it can hurt more than help. Why, do you ask? This is because the very point of these difficult times is for your teen to develop skills to cope with even bigger difficulties in the future. Life hands you challenges in small increments. Sometimes they are huge yes, but frequently they are adjusted huge for the level of maturity. So a toddler’s challenge is how do I find Mom when I’m lost in at the park. A teen’s challenge is how do I balance all I have to do and keep my sanity. What is too much? If you take the pain of the load away, they no longer have the opportunity to make decision. They miss the opportunity to go through that thought process. When the next big stressor comes a long, they buckle from the weight of it. They can’t deal. They have no ability to cope and resort to extreme measures to handle the pressure. Bad ones like drinking, drug use, eating disorders or they become depressed.

Life gives us challenges that we can chose to get through or sleep through. To get through them, your teen must have full awareness and presence of mind otherwise, they end up sleeping through a life lesson that could be invaluable for much more than a good grade or entrance into a respected university. No, this lesson gives them the tools to get through life and that is the most important challenge of them all.

4 Skills For ED Teens To Eat Better For The Holidays

Kemi — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 11:30:04 +0000

The holidays, a time of over indulgence and over eating. There are treats at work, treats at home, holiday parties with more treats and finally Thanksgiving dinner with, more treats. Sure this is an exercise in self-control for the average person, but for the anorexic or bulimic this time can trigger an exceptional kind of anxiety that can exacerbate or re-trigger an eating disorder making a controlled situation go out of control.

In anticipation of all the food, a teen with an eating disorder may begin to accommodate the overeating by starving themselves before the festivities begin. They may have anxiety about family and friends who mean well, but remind the anorexic teen to, eat. For the bulimic, the reverse may occur with secret overeating and hording food then purging or excessive exercise to rid of the calories.

If your teen has been doing well distracting themselves and developing a more positive body image, the thought of family who have not seen them for a whole year commenting on weight gain or loss might send them into a tail spin. Be prepared for this and have some protective measures in place for your teen.

1. Avoidance

Keep anorexic family members away from your teen or excuse yourself from those gatherings.

2. Rules

Establish rules with extended family to eliminate body image discussion or appearance with your teen. If they can’t do this well then they probably shouldn’t be around your teen, but if they can, they are part of the buffer that should help protect your teen from other family.

3. Time-out

Let your teen know they should make you aware of what they are feeling especially if they’re overwhelmed or anxious. You can even have a secret code to help remove them from stressful or anxiety producing situations (e.g. a thumbs up from across the room). Discussing the plan and establishing a back-up plan can help reduce anxiety.

4. Medical Team

Check-ins with therapists and clinicians increased as needed. These resources help hold your teen accountable as well. They also serve to echo your rules, which give you a break from being the “bad guy.”

The holidays can be stressful for several reasons although they don’t need to be. With good communication and anticipation of potential pitfalls for your eating disorder teen, you can avoid unnecessary setbacks that could have your teen restart treatment or be hospitalized over the holiday season. Your preparation will keep them healthy and safe, home with you.

Teaching Your Teen To Manage Stress

Kemi — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 12:00:35 +0000

Your teen is under more stress in high school than ever before. Of course there are all types of stress, but if your teen has taken on sports, academic challenges, a job, volunteer activities, advanced courses and family duties, not to mention a significant other, they might forget that the most important thing is not always getting everything done.

Say that again? What, not get everything done?

Believe it or not sometimes it is important for your teen to learn how to set limits on what they can accomplish in a day. Of course having so much to do teaches organizational skills, but if your teen pushes themselves to the absolute limit, they may get things done but at great cost. Poor health, increased body weight and fatigue are a few things that result from being stressed. Your teen can’t just learn to be organized so they get everything done; they need to learn how to do this in a way that is sustainable over time. A way they can be productive in the future when you’re not there to bring them snacks or wake them up to go to bed when they fall asleep in their book.

To survive stressful workloads, your teen must learn how to take care of themselves:

1. Food

Food is yummy and it’s energy. Good food is better energy. Healthy snacking is ideal during stressful times. This is better for the body and brain than the junk food your teen usually falls back on.

2. Sleep

Disrupting sleep schedules with all-nighters and next day zombie functioning sabotages all of the hard work they have done and limits their ability as they try and do their best in a sleep deprived state. Your teen needs to know they will work very hard until a given time and then they must go to bed.

3. Exercise

Exercise is a well known stress reliever and keeps the brain sharp for efficient learning when they do sit and study. It also helps maintain weight and improve energy.

4. Breaks

Little enters the brain after 2 hours of sitting with an activity. So your teen should take a break and do something fun like a video game, knitting or watching a fun sit-com.

5. Moments

When there is so much to do your teen can under estimate how much they are doing. Taking the time to appreciate these moments is important so they realize the results of their hard work. Help them do this by taking them out for a special treat or leaving a “pride note” where you mention: how proud you are, that you realize how hard they are working, and you can appreciate how much they have accomplished.