5 Home For The Holidays Changes
You’re excited to pick up your college freshman for the holidays. Still you can’t keep from wondering, “How have they changed after their first semester of college? Freshman ten, freshman maturity, freshman attitude?”
Although you grieve the loss of your teen when you drop them off at the airport or campus, when your college freshman returns, you’re going to notice how the dynamics between you two or more in the household have changed. Here are a few things that may throw things off:
1. Rules
Your college freshman has become accustomed to their own schedule and their own curfew. They are just getting started with plans as you get ready for bed. As stunned as you are that they think they’re leaving the house at 10P, they are equally stunned that you think you can give them a curfew after living as an adult for the past few months. Discuss curfews and check-ins before they become an issue.
2. Home Sweet Home
If you have the luxury of a large home you may have been able to leave their room the same, but if you need to use your space efficiently, their room might have changed into a younger sibling’s room, the sewing room or your new study. This can throw your college student off and make them feel like their home is no longer theirs. They may even be homesick for their dorm. This can be even harder if parents have separated or divorced while the teen has been at college.
3. Regression
Your teen may regress to their dependent self while under your roof despite being very competent and self-reliant at school. This can confuse and concern you giving you less confidence in your teen’s ability to survive at school. When in actuality, your teen has been very mature at school and needs an opportunity to decompress at home with Mom and Dad who have lots of hugs, kisses and coddling.
4. Judgment
Your teen after learning about social injustices and exposure to other lifestyles and beliefs may realize their impact on the world and. They may be judgmental about your political choices. Brace yourself, and smile. This is part of the process of developing their sense of self and it will demonstrate to you that they are truly experiencing all of what college has to offer.
5. Regret
Your teen may be miserable and absolutely hate college. They may discuss transferring schools and wonder, “Why didn’t I choose the other college? There are no cool people there. The school is in the middle of nowhere. I hate my roommate!” As hard as it is, listen empathetically, but refrain from jumping in to solve their problem. Let them verbalize the thoughts in their head. As they do, they will come to a conclusion. When they do, let them take the lead on the execution of any plan required to complete their goal.
Your teen will leave a high school senior and return a college freshman. Their brain will have grown so much filled with experiences and discovery of who they are going to be. They still need room to grow and separate from you so although the family is getting together for turkey, brace yourself for your college freshman who still needs your support with even more independence on their journey to adulthood.
Related posts:
Loading ...